If You Can Understand

If you need love then look no further

Don’t spread your wings

No need to fly too far

If you need hope

Then i can give it to you

Fulfil all your dreams

And be your brightest star

If you want a chance

A chance to be loved

Give that chance to me

And i will be true

For in your waking hours

And the time that you sleep

I will be by your side

In all that you do

When chance is there

Don’t turn away

For these is no point regretting

When the times passed away

In my heart for you

There is a space

And with you in my heart

 I will have found my place

Always going to say

Never going to go

‘i love you’, three words

That mean more than the world to me

©sonofdel 2011

Wrote this for my fiancee when we were going through a bad patch.  Just wanted to remind her that she is the world to me.  Hope she never forgets it.

Mad Times

Not going to do a break down of everything we have done in the last week(s) or so.  Its been busy.........

Mainly sorting out christmas arrangements and getting my uni work done.  Have got to have my TMA02 in by 5th Jan at the latest and then my TMA03 in by 26th Jan !!!!!!!!!!!!

Health hasnt been brilliant but hey ho its that time of year.

Havent written any new stuff for quite some time and now its almost christmas i doubt that i will get the time.  Hope all my friends, family and readers are well and looking forward to a special christmas.

Hugs to those going through bad times and remember i am here if u need to talk (that what friends do)

Will keep posting every few days to let you know what we have been upto. A good thing is we are almost done christmas shopping (a miracle for us).

Warm wishes to all

My TMA01

Twelve Hours

The window reflects, strange distorted face

The image through the glass, cold, and dark

The pond, once beautiful, now an evil place

The landscape barren and stark

He turns, she still sits there

The photos and memories scattered before

Absentmindedly wipes away a lock of hair

And waits for the knock on the door

The man enters and looks down

He is sorry to disturb at this tragic time

And when he looks at me all he sees is a frown

And from the mantel clock there rings a chime

Just a few questions is all he says

And I turn and look out of the window once more

Yesterday was one of my darkest days

A day that rocked me to my core

She answers with a yes or a no

Doesn’t really know what is being said

And I turn and I shout at the top of my voice

‘For god’s sake sergeant our daughter is dead’

He sees the tears and looks embarrassed at the floor

And she still can’t look at me, not the way she used to

And he talks again for a few minutes more

Apologises and leaves, alone again are we two

Though I want to reach out and tell her it’s ok

I know in my heart that we each blame each other

We both want to talk, though have nothing to say

Then the phone rings again, this time it’s her mother

The tears start again and I feel hollow inside

I wonder what more I could have done

And I feel angry at myself for I still haven’t cried

And I turn and stare back into the sun

I feel like a man who has just lost his soul

And I know this feeling won’t ever go away

I should be the man, and just take control

but I can’t, I am not the man, not today

I can still feel her body as I lifted her out

The lights flashing behind me eyes

And in the darkness beyond I could hear shouts

And a series of pain laden cries

The kiss that I gave her to say one last farewell

The squeeze of her hand, simple thing

And I swear I could hear the last toll of a bell

As if the end of my life it did bring

Now I stand here alone, nothing inside

And she sits there and stares right through me

It’s been only twelve hours since our little girl died

Was it fate, our neglect, or a tragedy?

©Sonofdel 2011

I wrote this only a couple of weeks ago.  This was my original draft for my first exam on my OU course. I had to take an incident and make it into a poem.  It had to have impact and tell a story.  I got an 83 mark for this (although the final version had to be cut to 36 lines maximum)

OMG......what a week

Tuesday 22nd

Went town and did some more christmas shopping.  Got a few more items and came home as it was collllldddddd.

In the afternoon I decided to back up my documents and stuff onto our hard drive.

In the evening I watched some of the football that was on although i couldnt really concentrate on it..........mind was elsewhere.  Decided to watch another couple of carry on films to have a laugh.

Wednesday 23rd.

Had a visit from our friends mick and tony and they stayed for a couple of hours just having a general rattle.  Mick brought his new laptop down for me to give a onceover.  Its not a bad little system and it will be definitely do what he wants.  In the afternoon i  made a few phone calls and caught up with a few people. 

In the afternoon a little more coursework and went through my mp3 collection..........almost 15gig worth !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In the evening i watched the champions league football and again couldnt really get into it at all.  Watched another carry on film.

Thursday 24th.

Got up nice and early and packed the rest of the stuff we needed for our 4 days in Stoke.  Tony picked us up at about 9.30 and we made good time and arrived in stoke just after 11.00am.  Had a brew with tony before he set of back to Blackpool and spent a few hours catching up with my mum. 

At about 6.00pm we were collected by our friend Ian and taken down to my sisters.  Mandy and Roger went to a thanksgiving meal at their friends house and we offered to housesit and also watch our nephew Oliver. 

Mandy had made a lovely vegetable chilli and afterwards me, Deb and Oliver settled down to watch a movie.  Oliver decided on Drop Dead Fred a rather zany comedy starring Phoebe Cates and Rik Mayall.  Very funny in places and definitely can see why it appealed to a 12 year old.  After Oliver had gone bed we decided to scroll thorough the on demand services and ended up watching three episodes of a comedy series I had never seen (I am ashamed to say).  The series was Red Dwarf and it was very funny and I will definitely be watching more.

Mandy and Roger came home about 11.30pm and after a few minutes talking and the last twenty minutes of Mock the Week, we went to bed.

Friday 25th

Got up nice and early again (8.30am) and went into town with my sister and Oliver.  We met up with the family (my mum and my Auntie Pauline) and had a nice walk around Hanley town.  After my mum had left us me and Deb went back to my Auntie Paulines to put her christmas decs up with her.  I wasnt able to do a lot but my usual job is making sure that all the things that light up (there are over a dozen) are all controlled by one switch, so she doesnt have to bend too much.  These decs have to be seen to be believed !!!!!!!!!!
We left there at about 6.30pm and got a taxi home.  In the evening I helped my mum sort out her pc and also helped her to apply for broadband..........We are letting her loose on the internet (god help us.......lol).  Also watched a bit of tv with her before going to be about 1.00am absolutely shattered.

Saturday 26th

Again an early start (9.00am) and by ten thirty we were down town with my mother again who wanted to do some christmas shopping.  We had a good walk around too and while we were there we saw an army parade to welcome the soldiers back safely from Afghanistan.  There was quite a crowd.  We left my mum at about 12.00 and went back down to finish of my Aunt's decs from the day before.  We hadnt got a lot to do and used the day more to visit her and my Uncle Tony who i am sorry to say is a sufferer of Alzheimers (it has gotten a lot worse lately and we wanted to see him while he still knows who we are).  We had a good day and I made him laugh a few times (it was great to see them both).  We left at about 6.00pm and spent the evening doing nothing but relaxing and watching pointless television.

Sunday 27th

Wanted a lie in with it being Sunday unfortunately my body had other ideas and we were up just after 9.00am.  Spent a couple of hours with my mum and then at just after 12.30 our friend Ian collected us and took us down to his house where we had been invited for lunch.  It was a nice few hours and there was me, Deb, Ian and Pauline and Sarah and Mick (Sarah is Paulines daughter).  We had a good laugh and the afternoon passed really quickly.  Sarah and Mick left at about 5.00pm and then the four of us sat about talking rubbish and generally relaxing.  Pauline and Ian were going out at 7.30 and they were kind enough to give us a lift home (so glad they did as it was freezing outside).  Spent the rest of the evening trying to stay awake as we were both shattered.  Didnt go bed late at all.

Monday 28th

Up at 9.00am and packed the bag ready to come home.  Tony arrived at 11.00 and by 12.00 we were on our way back to Blackpool (we hadnt missed much as my sister Paula told us they had had 70mph winds!!!!!!!!!!).  Glad we missed that.  Got home and the house was freezing so the heating was on all day after that.  Sorted through the post and found out we had missed a parcel dlivery.  Checked email later in the afternoon to find out i had 366 emails in 5 days !!!!!!!!!!!!!!.  By the time i had cleared them down I had 71 left and the majority of these was surveys.  By the time I had finished it was gone 8.00pm and I was ready for sleep .........lol.  Didnt go though and spent rest of night just messing about on the net and watching TV.

Tuesday 29th.

OMG what a bloody ridiculous day this was.  Got up at 11.00am (finally got that lie-in i wanted).  Came down and switched the pc on only to find that there was no internet.  Bear in mind that this was the only day that i had planned to do a lot of stuff on the net (paying bills, ordering christmas presents, doing some course work etc......). 

Tried resetting the router and still nothing.  I rang Virgin media from my land line only to find that there were problems in the FY4 area (as we are FY3 i decided to give them a couple of hours).  At 15.30 still no internet (Deb had tried on her laptop too).  I rang virgin back and got told that there were no line problems and they gave me a freephone number to ring that dealt with peripheral problems.  I rang this only to be told that their computers were down and that they couldnt access any customer accounts and could i ring back in about an hour.  I waited until 5.00pm and rang their Technical support.  I spent the next 45 minutes being told to 'try this' and 'try that' and still nothing.  The gentleman (who I will not name) then told me that it could be my antivirus !!!!!!!!!!!.  A pc, a laptop and a netbook, two of them with different antiviruses ???????????.  After ruling this out he told me (and you wont believe this).......I quote 'well i cant find the problem so I suggest you try someone local !!!!!!!!!!!!'  I couldnt believe my ears, this was virgin media tech support and they were telling me to try someone else.  I rang back about two hours later and got through to a very helpful scottish gentleman called Jamie who informed me that Virgin Broadband had been having problems all day.  Why couldnt someone have told me that earlier ????.  I told him what the other gentleman had told me and he apologized as he couldnt believe it either.  He advised me to see if it was on by the morning and if not call back. 

In the evening we watched the new Lee Evans - Roadrunner dvd and although it was funny in places it didnt seem as good as his previous stand up dvd's.  *** (3 stars).

Wednesday 30th

Wow where did Noveber go ?

Ok got up and thankfully broadband was back (so much for it being a problem my end).  Got straight onto my virgin account and wrote a complaint letter which I emailed.  I have had a response to say it has been received and am now waiting for it to be dealt with (will keep you informed).  Spent most of the day doing the stuff I should have done the day before.  Mostly the bank, surveys and emails.  Did get a nice surprise in my email.  I told you a couple of weeks ago about the co-op panel i had done, well they sent me another £35 amazon voucher today............yippee............that will get another couple of Christmas presents.  We didnt get chance to do much else other than a Podiatry appointment.  I did find out something interesting though.  While i was at the podiatrists i asked what the difference was between a podiatrist and a chiropodist..................answer:  Anyone can be a chiropodist (even me).  You dont need any training, experience or nothing.  A podiatrist has to have 3 years university and a degree to set up.  Something I didnt know.

In the evening we decided to start on Supernatural season 6.  Not bad so far but lacking something at the moment.  Went bed at just before 2.00am.

Thursday 1st December

Not a lot to report from this day.  Other than emails and more christmas present ordering it was a quiet and trouble free day (still nothing of Virgin media). 

In the evening i got bored and watched some Europa league football.  First game was FC Twente v Fulham and to be honest i thought that Twente deserved the 1-0 win and it could have been a lot more.  The second game was Stoke v Dynamo Kiev and this was definitely Stoke's biggest test in the competition so far.  Kiev were slick all over the pitch an Stoke's power game didnt seem to be working at all and it was no surprise when Kiev went in front (albeit from a Stoke o.g. (Upson I think)).  Stoke played well and got their deserved equaliser right at the death with some brilliant play from Pennant (my man of the match) set up Kenwynne Jones for a simple header.  Stoke piled on the pressure in the last few minutes but the 1-1 draw was enough to see them through to the second round stages after Christmas (go go go go Stoke !!!!!!!!!)

After the football we settled down to watch some more Supernatural before going to bed just before 2.00am

Double dose

Sunday 20th

Well not a bad day again/  Got up quite early (well early for a Sunday anyway.  Brother-in-law picked us up just after 1.30 as it was our youngest nephew Alex's 3rd birthday and we were invited for the party..............lol  (cant beat cake and trifle on a Sunday).................takes me back to when I was a kid.

Got back just after 5pm and an hour later I was overjoyed that Liverpool had beat Chelsea 2-1 yeyyyyyyyyyy.  From the highlights it looked like Chelsea were terrible in the first half and we deserved to be leading 1-0 at the break (Maxi after he was un-selfishly set up be Bellamy).  Chelsea equalised shortly after the break with a (mis-cued???) shot from Sturridge.  After that Chelsea pressed but some resolute defending and some shocking finishing (Malouda) meant that it looked like a 1-1 was on the cards.  Right at the death Glen Johnson scored with a lovely turn of pace and finish and we came away from Stamford Bridge with a good 3 points.

In the evening I didnt do much other than a little gaming and watched a couple of episodes of Fringe.

Monday 21st

Had a visit from the Disability Resources team and they sorted me out some stuff.  Did a bit of course work and didnt do a lot else other than surveys as the weather was abysmal here.  Spoke to some friends and relatives on phone in the evening and watched another two episodes of Fringe.

Untimely

It always happens when we least expect it

It always happens when we don’t need it

It always happens when we don’t want it

It’s always untimely

Like the day can be full of sun and blue sky

The birds flying freely way up high

And it always leaves us asking why

It’s so untimely

There are days we hope will never end

When a stranger soon becomes our friend

When there is joy and laughter to attend

Then it’s untimely

It need not be a death or pain

It’s just something that attacks your brain

And leaves you standing in the rain

That’s untimely

©Sonofdel 2011

Well I guess this is what we all experience at sometime in our lives (usually more than once).  Its like planning for a holiay then breaking your leg three days before you were due to go.  We have all been there.

Ok Four days this time

Wednesday 16th

Well on this lovely day my sister and her boyfriend returned to Stoke.  Its been a good four days and as we did something on each one the time really flew.  After they had gone we didnt do a lot.  I caught up on email and surveys, which took me a good few hours and Deb caught up on designing stuff.  In the evening I decided to watch another couple of Carry on Films.  I watched Carry on Camping, Carry on up the Khyber and half of Carry on Abroad.  (dont know why but I am really in the mood to watch these just lately).

Thursday 17th

Went into town and also decided to order a new TV unit using my survey vouchers from Amazon (ready for when we get a new TV).  In the afternoon we didnt do a lot because we were down town a good three hours.  I did surveys and stuff when we got back and Deb did some card designing and some tag designing.  In the evening Deb did some singing and I watched the rest of Carry on Abroad, Carry on Up the Jungle and half of Carry on Dick.

Friday 18th

Debs birthday today yeyyyyyyyy.  She got up and opened her many cards (a lot of them hand made) and when she saw her present off our friend Sarah she was ecstatic.  She had bought her a double cd of Tatty Teddy decoupage.  So guess what she did in the afternoon............Yep she went through all the images lol.  We managed to get out for a couple of hours and just walked around town.  It looked like it was going to throw it down but luckily for us it didnt.  In the evening Deb insisted on making a Veg lasagne for tea so we had that with some garlic bread Yum Yum.  After that we settled down and watched Gnomeo & Juliet.  It was ok and it did have some funny moments (not least all the references to Shakespeares plays) but it wasnt as good as we thought it would be.  ** (2 stars).   After that we finished the night off with two episodes of Fringe (getting close to the end now).

Saturday 19th

Spent most of this day doing my coursework (as I had been lazy all week and hadnt done any).  I am really struggling at writing stage plays and this is definitely not something I could ever see myself doing professionally.  It was quite a dark and depressing day and I did manage to take a little time out to do some gaming in the evening (but only after I had caught up fully on my uni work).  Watched another two episodes of Fringe and went bed

Noise

Oh no, the phone is ringing

Aagh!! The birds have started singing

The workmen drilling down the road

The croaking of an early toad

Clinking bottles from the milkman

A school kid kicking a rusty can

The papergirl makes such a noise

Screamed abuse from a bunch of boys

Television blaring, I can hear

I wish they would all just disappear

They shout and scream and run about

I wish, the noise, I could lock out

I tried counting sheep, but they just bleated

I told myself I would not be defeated

So with my last ounce of patience, I covered my head

Then my mum shouted ‘come on, time to get out of bed’

©Sonofdel 2011

Well everyone can relate to this.  You know one of those days where you just want to sleep and no matter what you try there is always some noise making sure you dont.  Well this is one of those days.

Three Days in One

Well here is the blog for the last three days.  I know its a little late but having visitors here I would have felt a little rude if I had spent my time writing my blog (havent done any Uni work either) 

Sunday 13th

Not a lot happened today as we fancied a day in.  We did have a walk around to our local shops.  We were not out long as it was quite cold.  In the afternoon Me and Roger were on our computers while Deb and Mandi were at the table talking about food and cooking.

Sat and talked and had a drink in the evening

Monday 14th

Got up nice and early and all four of us went to Fleetwood for the day.  Got there only to find that Fleetwood Market was closed so we had a nice slow walk down the high street.  Went in a few charity shops and got some good bargains.  Dvd's, books, a couple of pc games and a rather cool t-shirt with a cartoon caricature of Tommy Cooper on it (class).  Had a lovely meal in a nice little cafe just of the main street and after looking in a few more shops we caught the bus home.

In the evening we decided to watch a couple of Carry on films.  First up was Henry.  I love this one and the humour still has me giggling even though I have seen it about a dozen times.  We all enjoyed it and got us ready to watch another.  We had some drinks (wine) and settle down to the next one which was Cleo (with the immortal phrase....Infamy....Infamy....theyve all got it in-for-me (Kenneth Williams as Emperor Ceasar)).  A lot of laughs and some great scenes.  I am sorry but I love the Carry on films and for the budget they were made with they are a credit to the English film industry).

Had a few more drinks and went bed at about 2.30am

Tuesday 15th

Went into town and did some food shopping.  We were out about two hours and we got back early because our nephew Michael was coming down with his girlfriend Lauren and their new baby Daisy.  They arrived at about 5.30pm and stayed for about three hours.  I held little Daisy and she gurgled at me (more sense than I get out of most of my older nephews............lol).  I watched the England v Sweden game and I thought we played good.  All in all we deserved the win and for England to score their 2000th goal was a huge milestone.

Early night as we were all shattered.  I did finally open my bottle of Three Barrels (Jack Daniels) and me and Roger toasted a glass.  Very nice and smooth and a lovely drink (highly recommended for those who appreciate quality, not the teen lager boys).

Six Weeks

Well it’s almost time, not long to go

Just six weeks left before I start high school

That fateful first morning when I say hello

And have to start abiding by rules

Well its five weeks and counting the nerves are now here

The thought of everyone being bigger than me

I hope by the day that they have disappeared

And that fun and enjoyment is what it will be

Well four weeks to go and my school uniform is bought

My shoes are brand new and in the wardrobe they stay

I will try to remember all the things I have been taught

That will help me get though that first fearful day

Three weeks to the day until I walk through the gates

Twenty one days until there’s no turning back

Meeting the teachers and making new mates

In uniforms that are just red and black

Two weeks to go and my uniform I tried

A liquorice allsort I looked like at first

As I stood there and looked I tried not to cry

Then suddenly into tears my mum burst

Well one week to go, seven days of frustration

It’s going too slow or maybe too fast

I can imagine it’s like this all across the nation

The six weeks of waiting are now almost past

Well it’s my first day at high school, in uniform I stand

With my lunch money in my pocket and my stuff in my bag

And they kiss me and tell me to listen and understand

I feel like I should be waving a white flag

Well its over and to be honest there was nothing to fear

No torture or pain like my brother had said

So now I can’t wait until tomorrow is here

So I close my eyes and fall asleep on my bed

©sonofdel 2011

I wrote this because my nephew at the time was due to start high school and he was a little bit intimidated by the thought.  It was the start of the six week holiday and he was counting down the days until he started his new school.  I guess we are all like this when we are due to start high school.  I was (if i can remember back that far).

Nashville Rose

Well I have been all round the world

And no one could ever be

Like my pretty western rose

From Nashville, Tennessee

In the years that passed me by

I traveled near and far

From New York to Mexico

Following the wandering star

But all the while I travelled

One thing was in my mind

That all the time I spent away

The one I left behind

Well I have been all round the world

And no one could ever be

Like my pretty western rose

From Nashville, Tennessee

So no matter where I go

And no matter what I do

My thoughts are never miles away

They stay with only you

For you have taken all my heart

And kept it safe for me

And now its time I did return

To Nashville, Tennessee

Well I have been all round the world

And no one could ever be

Like my pretty western rose

From Nashville, Tennessee

So now I am back here again

My heart can be set free

And I can spend my life with you

My rose from Tennessee

©Sonofdel 2011

Well this is one of a few songs I have written and hopefully one day I will find someone who can put music to them and maybe sing them too.  This as you can probably guess is a country love song

Man is he funny

Well the day started with me and Deb cleaning and getting ready for the arrival of my sister Mandy and her boyfriend Roger.  We cleaned everywhere (even polished the spiders and made sure their webs were dust free...........lol).

Did a bit of email and a few surveys while we waited for them and at 16.45 I decided to watch the England v Spain (pointless) friendly.  England won 1-0 but how is anyones guess.  Spain absolutely controlled the game and should have won but some resolute defending, a lot of poor finishing and a slice of luck helped England to escape with the win.  I didnt really see much was gained but no doubt people are now saying we can win Euro 2012 and to be honest we have as much chance as anyone.  Outstanding player on the day Scott Parker (played superb).

My sister arrived at just after 18.00 and after having a quick cup of tea and a chat we decided to get ourselves ready for our night out.  We had a taxi booked and it arrived bang on time and we were at the theatre for just after 19.00.  We all thoroughly enjoyed Mike Harding and though quite a few of the jokes we had heard before he delivered them so well we just had to laugh at them.  Some good funny songs and a very serious one called 'Bombers Moon', about the ones who sacrificed their lives piloting and gunning on the Lancaster Bombers that used to operate during the war.  I only found out that night that the average life expectancy for a Lancaster gunner was three weeks !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After the two hour show we came home and just talked about the show for a couple of hours and had a couple of drinks.  Went bed at about 1.00am.
 

Watching the Clouds

Sitting here on the grass

I just watch and wait

There doesn't seem to be a thing to do

I look up to the sky

And watch the clouds roll by

The only sound I hear

Is the sound of the dragonflies wings

They hover and fly, at a pond nearby

I shield my eyes from the sun

And watch the clouds roll by

Each breath is like my last

I think of moments, I recount

My past becomes my present

As the day rolls idly by

And still I sit here

And watch the clouds roll by

©Sonofdel 2011

I remember days in my life when I used to go and sit on a grass bank not far from where I used to live and just lie back and dream, most of the time with my eyes open.  Its amazing what you think of when you just watch the clouds roll by.

Getting Ready

Well my sister arrives tomorrow and we are all going to see Mike Harding on Saturday night (should be a right laugh).  I have a lot of his earlier stuff on my pc, from Captain legless meets Superdrunk to The 14 1/2 pound budgie.  Hilarious.

Upto date on my course so I can take a couple of days of to entertain.  Deb is snowed under with christmas card making (no joke intended).  She is worn out, bless her and she still has almost 40 left to make !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I reached my £40 on OnePoll and have started back at 0 again and am already back over £1................lol

In the evening Tony came down for an hour with the mad dog (Snoop) and we had a rattle and a coffee.  Deb took some deserved time-out until after he had gone and then it was back to making cards for her.

I did another couple of hours on Dragon Age and went to bed about 2.15am (I was shattered)

Corners

We come to them worried, which way to turn

What lessons are here, how much to learn

Is this the way, where will it lead

Will this make me fail or will I succeed

They are corners we come to, turn them some do

And sometimes they lead to a future so blue

And sometimes we find that they lead us to joy

But decisions we make, our lives can destroy

Take mine for instance the corner I found

Should I stay ever wondering or should I go round

This was the choice that was lying for me

To stay in my past, or my new destiny

Well the corner I turned, and there you were waiting

With your smile and your warmth so alive and invigorating

And still there are corners I come to in life

And some they are treacherous like the blade of a knife

But these corners hold no fear with you by my side

For with our eyes wide open, we fear not nor hide

For together we are stronger and the decisions we make

Will be ours forever on this journey we take

©Sonofdel 2011

This is another of those poems that is basically about the decisions we make in life (or dont make).  Someone once said it is better to die regretting things you did rather than regretting things you didnt.  This just illustrates that all life is full of corners and some we are too scared to turn.

Pleased (Thursday)

Well it wasnt a bad day and we decided to go to town again and get some more bits and bobs.  Nothing exciting.

In the afternoon I did another assignment for my course that was amusing and interesting.  Had to write a few lines of a play using two contrasting voices with different opinions and tastes.  Very cool.

In the evening I did some more email and surveys galore.  Need £40 to cash in on OnePoll and finished the night on £39.95 lol.

Got my TMA score in the evening and I am pleased to say I got an 83 (out of 100).  I was hoping to get 50-60 so I am more than pleased with the result.

While out we went in The Works and I picked up another three books to add to my growing collection.

1) If I didnt write it no one else would - Eric Sykes
2) Born Brilliant - The life of Kenneth Williams
3) My shit life so far - Frankie Boyle

Finished of the evening with a couple of hours of Dragon Age II.  (very complex game and thoroughly enjoyable)

Passage of Innocence

It was ok to start with well it was just a game

I am Scoz, that’s what they call me, though it aint my real name

We were just a group of kids, mucking about on the street

Just dossing and trashing things, it was kinda neat

We met up together one night in a park

Just smoking and drinking and fooling about in the dark

Harmless abuse shouted at passers by

Looking for trouble with a teenagers eye

Littering streets didn’t seem that bad to us

People complained but we didn’t give a hell about the fuss

The odd fight here and there, nothing that bad

And sometimes a bit of graffiti but none of us were mad

That was how it was just a game and a bit of fun

Until that night down the park when there appeared a gun

Can’t remember where we got it, don’t really want to think

But it’s amazing how your mind works when it’s been fuelled by drink

None of us had any money but we needed some more booze

A good idea to pretend to rob we thought we had nothing to lose

So the corner shop that opened late seemed a good place

And the man who served he hated us, and I couldn’t stand his face

So I walked in bold as brass and aimed it at him there

And told him I wanted money but all he did was stand and stare

And then he started laughing at me like it was just some joke

But I wasn’t having any of it because I was drunk and broke

Then he started coming towards me shouting abuse all the time

Told me he would call the police telling them I had committed a crime

And he reached for me and tried to take the gun from out of my hand

And I swear it went of by accident though no one understands

His expression changed from smiling to a look of outright fear

And as I saw the blood cascade from him as he stumbled ever near

And I dropped the gun and ran from there as fast as I was able

And ran for my life down the streets on legs that were unstable

Well I got caught and now I face a prison term real soon

I sit here in this cell and through the bars I see the moon

And I wonder if I will ever get the chance to live again

Or will I be incarcerated, a prisoner in my brain

I hear the footsteps closer now and I know my time is here

And my defence has told me state the facts in a voice so crystal clear

But what more can I say than what obviously makes sense

I have lost my way as I walked down my passage of innocence

©Sonofdel 2011

I wrote this because I know that as a teenager everything you do seems like a joke or a laugh.  This shows how it can escalate and suddenly it is not so funny any more.  I know a lot of kids today just think that they can get away with anything. Wrong.

Book buying day

Well I got up and it was not nice weather at all.  We decided we were not going anywhere even though we really had lots to do.  Anyway the weather changed and so did our decision.  We decided to go to Cleveley for a couple of hours.

Went into a few charity shops and managed to pick up a few books

1) Hattie: The life of Hattie Jaques
2) The Sound of Laughter: Peter Kay
3) My Booky Wook : Russell Brand (Debs)
4) From Dead to Worse: Charlaine Harris (Debs)
5) Life Expectancy: Dean Koontz
6) Rock on Tommy the life of Cannon and Ball: Chris Gidney

A varied choice there and I will let you know what they are like.  Called in the market and had a look around.  Saw a really nice Jack Daniels t-shirt that U have my eye on now.  Also on our day out we managed to pick up some more christmas presents and some shopping.

Didnt do a lot in the evening except play Dragon Age II.

Time Tricks

A day seems like an hour

When you are here and we are together

Just one day but it goes so quick

We walk together, talk together

We look into each others eyes

Hand in hand

Sometimes we kiss, but always we love

When I am with you

A day seems like an hour

An hour seems like a day

When you are not with me

When I wait for the phone to ring

Just to hear your voice

That warms me and comforts me

When your body is not there for me to hold

When your kiss is not placed upon my lips

An hour seems like a day

A lifetime isn’t long enough

When we are together always

When we have both said ‘I do’

When the rings are placed on our fingers

And the future beckons us

Together we will face the good and bad

And just to know that you will always be there

A lifetime isn’t long enough

©Sonofdel 2011

Another poem I wrote to describe how Deb makes me feel.  When I am with her time seems to stand still, even after eleven years.  When you feel like this about someone you know how true the love is.

A sorting out day

Well the morning started early (well early for me).  Up at 9.00am and fifteen minutes later we had visitors.  Tony had just finished viewing the house next door (gutted because my friend of almost 25 years was going to move in) and he liked it that much that he filled in the application and took it straight down to the agents.  Just got to wait now to see if he gets it.

Mick and Tony had a couple of cuppa's and stayed for a couple of hours.  After they had gone Deb decided to make a list of all the cards that she has got to make before christmas.  Counting family and friends and the odd birthday, she has got to make 39 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...........well I guess I will get to see her at some point..............LOL

In the afternoon I decided to go through all the word documents on my pc and sort them into folders (deleted a few).  Deb had a mess around with my blog and helped me to improve the layout.

Completed Fear 3 and its not really that impressive.  Some good fights and a pretty decent end boss but nothing to get excited about. ** (2 star).

Have started playing Dragon Age II and if its as good as the first game then I am in for a lot of adventure and quests.  Will keep you posted.

Watched one episode of Fringe and then went bed because I was shattered.

Who

Who will stand at my grave and cry silent tears

To bounce on my coffin like the rain I shall never feel again

Who will say words to comfort those left

To say what I did and how much a man was I

They lie

I am nothing never have been

I live, I breathe, I die, this is me

My heart beat will stop but it’s been dead all my life

My breath no more, but the coldness is there now

Who will be there to remember my voice?

Who will hear my words night after night?

I did no wrong

Why am I punished?

My pain will be gone and who will remember

I walked with them all, rain sleet or snow

I talked them out of their problems

And yet they didn’t see mine

Joker, fool, friend, a laugh, but who

Who will remember the real me?

©Sonofdel 2011

Wrote this on another of my not-so-good days.  I needed someone and there didnt seem to be anyone there for me.  I wondered just who in my life actually knew ME..............not who people wanted me to be...........not who people thought I was.................but ME

Amazon here I come .........lol

Well what a day .........
bloody cold but a good day nonetheless.

Got paid by three survey companies all on the same day Hive (£20 amazon voucher), MyVoice (£20 amazon voucher) and Valued Opinions (£10 amazon voucher)........all goes towards our new TV.

Didnt do a lot interesting other than start the next part of my course (the part I was dreading).  I am learning to write plays and its not as easy as you might think.  Only started with a brief introduction but wow was it difficult.  Will let you know how it develops.

Went out briefly but only to the local shops as it was freezing (I swear my hands were only warm for about an hour all day)  Spoke to a few people on the phone, family, friends etc.

No football this week and the next entertainment is Saturday evening when England play yet another pointless friendly against Spain (I expect to lose this one).

In the evening we watched Hangover II and while it was again funny in places it still didnt do a lot for me.  Some of the jokes and humour people will find either purile, sick or gross.......lol  *** (3 star)

Bed at 2.00am

The Terror

Though tales are told and stories read

Of horror, terror, fear and dread

If they make you cry or hide away

Then away from this story stay

It happened many a year ago

And is talked about all time

This was a simple hideous task

A most repulsive crime

This man he sat and thought bad things

Not knowing all the trouble he would bring

If only he had known all the facts

Before leaving us with income tax

It’s caused such trouble, grief and strife

And many a man has split from his wife

And it will cause more troubles just wait and see

And it’s all the fault of a bloody mp

©Sonofdel 2011

Not really any reason to write this other than I wanted to make people smile.  Everyone hates tax............lol

Sunday and man is it cooooooooold

Well had a lie in and didnt get out of my pit until almost midday (to be fair I didnt go to bed until 4.00am.  Had a fair few emails to sort through and sorted out some more course stuff.  Decided I only felt like watching one football match yesterday and though it was entertaining enough it was totally one sided.

The match was Bolton v Stoke from the Reebok Stadium.  Stoke had a mixed week last week starting with a 3-1 defeat at home (see last weeks post) and then winning in Europe away 2-1 (last weeks post).  It started of how it was destined to go.  Bolton took an early lead when the referee made a decision (wrong) to award Bolton a free kick for what he deemed was a deliberate backpass.  It was taken quickly by Klasnic and Kevin Davies put them in front.  The next few chances were shared but no one looked like dominating the game until Chris Eagles capitalized on a stoke goalkeeping error to lash a left foot shot from twenty five yards into the bottom right corner.  first half ended 2-0.  Stoke tried to push for a goal but it was Bolton who went 3-0 up through Klasnic after some great work from Eagles (man of the match by far).  They then went 4-0 up when A brilliant bit of play from first Keven Daves, then Klasnic who played a weighted pass through the Stoke defence for Eagles to score his second with a delicate lift over the advancing keeper.  Klasnic added a fifth wih a header.  It ended 5-0 and it could have been worse.

In the evening I played a bit of FEAR 3 on pc.  Scary game but basically just a shoot-em-up.  Not bad but nothing special.

Later we watched The Hangover  Not a bad film with some funny moments in it and some good characters.  A rare cameo from Mike Tyson didnt really do much for the film and added characters such as a chinese homosexual sounding gangster, a stripper and a tiger !!!!!!!!! made the film plod along nicely.  *** (3 stars)

Watched one episode of Fringe and then went to bed.

Six months

They told me, but it’s not sunk in

I can’t accept it

It’s just a dream, tell me I’m dreaming

There must be some mistake, surely

How can I be dying?

I don’t drink, I don’t smoke

I’ve never done anything bad

It can’t be me, I’m only twenty

I’ve had no life yet, done nothing

I’m learning to drive

My girlfriends expecting our baby

I’ve just been promoted at work

Five months they tell me

Six at the most

I won’t get to see my child

No twenty first birthday for me

A brain tumour that’s what I’ve got

It’s malignant I’m sorry

My mum is crying, my dad is quiet

My girlfriend holds me tight and tells me she loves me

It’s just not fair, life’s so cruel

I’ve had hundreds of sympathy cards

I only went to the doctors because my head hurt

Would it be better to die of ignorance, well would it?

©Sonofdel 2011

 

Wrote this one day after reading about a young man who had been told he had a brain tumour and that he wouldnt get to see his 21st birthday.  I kind of got to trying to imagine how I would cope with being told such a horrible piece of news.  I cant really imagine, but this is my best guess.

Another bloody draw at home.........

Another Saturday and another day of football.  Watched two matches though one almost had me pulling my hair out.

First match was Newcastle v Everton and this wasnt a bad game although evertons finishing (particularly Louis Saha) was diabolical.  Newcastle had the best of the early possession and went in front by a unfortunate own goal by Everton's Johnny Heitinga.  The second and deciding goal was a superb half volley looping shot from Ryan Taylor from outside the area.  Newcastle were playing well but so were Everton and they cut the deficit to 2-1 on the stroke of half time with a Jack Rodwell header from a corner.  In the second half there were chances for both sides and Saha should have had a couple of goals himself.  It was a good game and it ended 2-1.

The second game (aggggghhhh) was Liverpool v Swansea and I had hoped for an easy win.  We had some good early possession and this led to Andy Carroll hitting the crossbar from about three yards when it would have been easier to score.  We dominated possession but only looked like scoring on a couple of occasions (usually when Luis Suarez was on the ball).  At half time the score was 0-0 and it looked like just a matter of time before Liverpool scored.  Second half was a completely different story and Swansea took the game to us creating a lot of good chances and we were fortunate to get away with 0-0.  We did create a few chances at the end (Swansea looked tired) but we still couldnt finish and it was another disappointing home result.

In the evening I played a bit of rage and did my blog updates.

Watched a couple more episodes of Fringe then went to bed at about 2.00am

Welcome to the Library

To the library of life, welcome to all

Whether you’re big or maybe you’re small

We don’t care if you are young or you’re old

You can be weak or you can be bold

Just browse at your leisure the topics we have

Some might make you cry, some make you laugh

There are topics galore for you to enjoy

So come through the door, no need to be coy

We promise you a journey through laughter and tears

That will show you the future and turn back the years

Your mind will be filled with the mysteries within

So without further ado let us begin

Oh just a quick word to start you on your way

If you have any comments or anything to say

Don’t be afraid to let us know how you feel

And maybe we can help, hope that’s a deal

Well be off with you now for the library is waiting

No more from us and no more hesitating

Enjoy please do the messages they send

If you like what you read then please tell your friends

©Sonofdel 2011

Well this is basically just a poem about life and all it has to offer.  Over the years we all get to experience lifes vast journey and we never seem to get the chance to explore it all.  Somethings will always be a mystery

Almost bonfire night

Although havent done anything today thats mega-exciting I did some surveys and emails. 

I cant believe that its bonfire night tomorrow night.  Man where has this year gone.  Doesnt seem five minutes ago that we were welcoming it in and now here we are preparing for christmas....sheeeeeeeesh

Well its been a busy year here so far and even as far back as the beginning of January we have either been visiting other people or had people visiting us.  I dont think that there has been one month this year when we have not done something to do with visiting.  So far this year my mum has visited twice, my sister Mandy two or three times, our friends Pauline and Ian four or five times.  It makes you popular living by the sea....................lol

Like I said I didnt do anything exciting at all. 

Vicious Circle

What goes around comes around

I now believe it’s true

The way you once treated me

Is coming back on you

The lies you told as if they were truth

Deception just a game to you

But now they don’t seem so good

When they suddenly come true

The way you made me feel inside

Self confidence no longer here

But it hurts more to know that it made you smile

And your game was crystal clear

I can see the pain deep in your eyes

You talk, but don’t make a sound

You know how it feels to be hurt and confused

The vicious circle has now come around

©Sonofdel 2011

Wrote this because I was kind of tired of people stabbing me in the back, talking about me like I was nothing and then coming to me when everything was going bad for them.

Hmmmmmmmmmm..........

Well it was another one of those days that seemed to pass without too much interesting happening.  Did my daily emails etc.......

Had a walk around the corner and put a cheque in the bank (£33.93) global testmarket (survey company I have mentioned in a previous post and hope that some people have joined the companies I have recommended and are on the way to making themselves some money/vouchers).  Sky was very dark and the threat of rain was evident.  We had been back in for maybe ten minutes when the heavens opened and it poured down.  Stayed that way for a couple of hours.

Well in the late afternoon/evening I decided an evening of Europa League football was on the cards and so I settled down to watch two matches.  The first was Maccabi Tel Aviv against Stoke City (see two weeks ago's entry for first match).  This went pretty much all Stoke's way and they did play a lot better than on Monday night against Newcastle.  They were always in control and deservedly took a 2-0 lead through goals from Dean Whitehead and Peter Crouch (the latters first touch after coming on as a sub in the second half) and even though Maccabi pulled a late goal back the result was always in Stoke's hands.

The second match was one of the best I have seen in European Competition for a long time.  It was the return match of Fulham v Wisla Krakow.  The first match was a scrappy affair (see post from two weeks ago).  This game was brilliant.  I didnt know whether Wisla would just play for a draw but they certainly didnt.  It was end to end football and the first goal went to Fulham after some slick one touch football led to Damien Duff scoring a close range goal.  Wisla equalised soon after thanks to a deflected shot.  It wasnt long before Fulham went back in front with the goal of the night from Andrew Johnson.  A clever bit of play on the right wing led to a cross which was superbly volleyed in by him.  After that it was again end to end with Wisla showing that they werent going to lie back and accept defeat.  It was Fulham who extended their lead in the second half with a training ground free kick that ended with Johnson dinking the ball over the keeper from a tight angle and scoring his second of the night.  Fulham scored again soon after as Steve Sidwell (just come on as sub) scored from close range after a brilliant save from the Polish goalkeeper denied him the first time.  It ended 4-1 but on the night it could have been any score.

The other British clubs that played last night had mixed results Rubin Kazan pulled of a 1-0 win against a very changed Tottenham side that included a lot of inexperienced/young players (it was a good run out for them though and Rubin were at full strength).  Celtic pulled of a 3-1 victory over Rennes to boost their hopes in their group table.  Shamrock Rovers went down 3-1 to PAOK Salonika .  Birmingham City pulled of a great second half comeback to come from 2-0 down to draw 2-2 with Club Bruges.

Later in the evening we watched the last two (maybe final) episodes of series 5 of Doc Martin.  Though I will be sad to see it end I dont think that they can do much more with the storyline.

Went bed didnt read.

Old Man's Walk

This dusty road which I traverse with a smile

As I pass my yesterdays and think of the past

The days in the summer the heat, a test

And the cold days of winter, the icy blast

The fall of the leaves each autumn that came

The smell of the fires that November brought

The smiles at Christmas, some genuine, some forced

The gifts that were given, with love and with thought

I remember them well and still I don’t regret

That I shall never see them again and relive the joy

For that was then and this now

It’s impossible to return to that little, smiling boy

So the past is gone and the future beckons me

The footsteps are slower now, the walk not quite straight

The ambling of an older man, but happy

Walking the day, that leads me to fate

For my age it has caught me and my friends have all gone

My life is empty, but still I am here, waiting

I lived a good life, did things of which I am proud

My children they love me, they remonstrate me

Too old for those long walks, they tell me more and more

Should stay indoors and keep warm, nice

I guess age hasn’t changed the man inside me

I still can’t take good advice

Well it’s another day now and the sky is so blue

And I walk again down this path, same one for years

The tree that I planted all those years ago

It looks good in the sun, a fool crying tears

My house is right there in front of me, but it seems so far

Why do my legs not want to continue this stroll?

And suddenly I know that I have made a mistake

And onto the dusty path I roll

I realise with a smile that my journey is over

The blue sky looks dark now and the tree seems to know

That my days and my nights of waiting are done

And with them the years pass me by and the memories go

©Sonofdel 2011

Well his was just one of those poems I wrote when I was sort of thinking about life and how you know you have lived it or not.  I guess sometime in our lives we will all have feelings like this.